John, this is some lovely swash action. It reads for me. I’d suggest not using the white hairlines to define edges. I like the beginning EIG more because of it. The backside of the cross-stroke on T seems a little thin, maybe should be closer to the front side of the cross-stroke on the H? The tail on the r seems a little horsey and the finial too sharp. You have a (sort of ) ball terminal on the cross-stroke on the EIG, but then you use sharp on the second E and the R and O. Not that combining both is bad, but maybe you need to decide how and where those are used a little bit more?

Thanks Miss Tiffany for your suggestions

looking great ... the only crit at the moment is the shifting position of the strokes in the EGH’s. Love the syle thought.

great stuff.

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Paul Ducco
Design Studio Melbourne

I love it.

I think the hairline strokes work perfectly to show when the swash is behind or in front of the letter.

Great work.