Maybe just a little mosre space between the r & e. You wanted to you could also try pulling the arm of the r over towards the e if you did that. That might make the air around each letter more equivalent.

Why the new thread?

Because the other thread was about the business card, and therefore didn't really belong in this forum. And I'm anal retentive, OK? :)

Speaking of anal retentive, the r & e could only take the slightest nudge apart, IMO - any more felt like too much:

It's possible that the puddles need to be nudged - they can easily make the kerning seem all out of whack.

I feel like the gap between the e and the a is a hair big, but it is really hard to judge with the puddles. The type in general is really fun though :)

This font was designed to be set tighter I think - so when you open it up for logo use if you want to make it splendid instead of very good you have to change the shapes of the letters. I think it is quite good now. I might add a hair more space between the s & c to get that last little bit of what's possible before you edit outlines. BTW I think the wider spacing works better & is needed because the bright colors and the relative darkness of them interferes with reading the letter shapes a little. The extra space leps you find the forms. What if the puddle were slightly less high? Or higher? How does that feel? What if the puddles were just a bit lower?

Here's some further adjustment, this time shown small as well - I think it's pretty obvious that I'm going to need a version for small sizes, with its own spacing. Eben, the logo will mostly be seen at small sizes, with the glaring exception of the large banner. While the latter may well benefit from changing the letterforms, I think the former won't.

While the latter may well benefit from changing the letterforms, I think the former won’t.

Making adjustments to letters isn't easy and it isn't as if you are going off the rails here - it's really just a question of how far you feel like taking it. Theoretically you could make adjustments for any optical size that was different than the one the font was designed to be used in. Unless you want to second guess the designer, in which case you can have at the intended sizes too. I tend to want to do all that. Then there is the question of specific letter relationships and the question of being eye catching. Either of those could also drive you to adjust letters - especially in a logo. In your logo though the color is the eye catcher. For me this is what's left: the r keeps grabbing my attention because it feels too dark/heavy to me. But that may just be me. I would probably try a bit more space between the s&c again as well.

I hope my comments about moving the puddles (in your other thread) didn't frustrate you. I didn't realize (or read) that you were at the fine-tuning stage.

I think the am is a little loose still. The ea could be a hair loose too. (In both sizes.)

I think the am is a little loose still. The ea could be a hair loose too. (In both sizes.)

Yes, I think you are right. That might be a place for special logo oriented letter shape alteration. Either the left outer serif on the m, or the tail of the a or a bit of both.

You could also just open everything up to match the a/m relationship. If it was going to be used very small I might go that route. For use at larger sizes I would pull the m in tighter.

Thank you both for these suggestions - I see what you mean. I've been forbidden from touching the logo any more, but if I sneak in some tweaks, it will be to extend the a tail a little, and perhaps loosen up the front of the word to match the end.

For now, though - I need to finish the flavors, sizes, and biz cards! We sell sorbet Sunday. :)

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http://www.flickr.com/photos/eeblet/
Live near Oakland? Now in Jack London Square on Sundays: screamsorbet.com

Thanks again - the next version of the banner will have the touched-up logo on it. For your entertainment (or perhaps boredom), here's a shot of the boys serving up some sorbet for the first time:

This banner was printed a few weeks ago, but we'll be printing another at some point soon, especially because... I got the address wrong. A humbling reminder that design is most importantly about clear communication of content....

That is very attractive. Nice to see the concept in use.

Sharon

I wish another color could be used for "scream". Black isn't fresh enough for sorbet. Even a dark blue or green might work.

Tom

With all those rainbow colors? Not to my taste. :)

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http://www.flickr.com/photos/eeblet/
Live near Oakland? Now in Jack London Square on Sundays: screamsorbet.com

I think the use of black is the best as it really is a good contrast to the pop of the full-saturation of the colors.

I see what you all are saying. A shade of gray may work. Or not :)

Tom

Congratulations, you must be proud seeing it in action like that. Keep up the good work!

Thanks again, everyone! It's exciting.

(And of course, I can't stop - they change flavors each week.... and I seem to change the design of the printed materials each week!)

PS-Tom, you can't tell from my bad photo, or in the RGB version of the logo: the text is not exactly grey, but not quite as fully black as it could be.